Overcoming Anxiety as a Business Owner ft. Carter Gaskins | Ep #9

We uncover the raw truths behind physical and mental pain. Carter Gaskins, the creative force behind Gaskings Photography Collection and host of the newly launched 'Strong Mental Mindset' podcast, gets real about his mental health journey.

From enduring the heartbreaking loss of his son to battling agoraphobia, anxiety, and depression, Carter’s story is one of resilience and faith. He reveals how prayer, self-belief, and therapy became his anchors through life’s storms and opens up about the role of community and authenticity in personal branding.

Whether you're a business owner navigating your own mental health or someone seeking inspiration, Carter's insights on healing, growth, and building a strong mental mindset will leave you motivated and empowered.

Follow Carter:
IG: https://www.instagram.com/Gaskinsphotographycollection
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carter.gaskins.3
Website: https://www.gaskins-photography.com/

Book Your Personal Branding Session with Us: https://forms.gle/GJz5sfz7z8c94HNS9

Chapters

• 0:00 Intro
• 2:25 Carter’s Story
• 4:58 Self-Criticism
• 9:03 The Strong Mental Mindset Podcast
• 16:38 Personal Branding Bundle
• 17:21 Battling Mental Health Struggles
• 27:27 Challenges for Business Owners
• 39:09 Final Takeaways

Transcript

This week on the Authentic Media Podcast, 

physical pain is nothing compared to mental pain. 

Mm. 

I can go through physical pain, that's nothing. 

Yeah. 

But mental pain, when you don't know what is actually going on, it's very, very hard to get out of. 

As you are showing up every day, everyone doesn't see the behind the scenes, right?

No one knows what's going on in your world. They don't care. They just want your surface. They're just like, Hey Carter, like where are you at? But deep down, you're like in the bathroom somewhere, like having a mental break. 

Prayer has to be first. After prayer, you have to start believing in yourself. You start reading how to find yourself, how to figure out who you are, because I lost who I was.

Okay. Welcome to the show. Carter Gaskins. First of all, this is like a really exciting time because people have seen you Behind the scenes, they know, they know you as my photographer, which I always say, like, this is my photographer, which I don't say that because like I own you. I'm just like, there's something about you.

That's like, this is mine, you know, the things that we've created is really special. And so, um, but yeah, that's it. All laughs aside, welcome to the show, Carter. How are you feeling? Are you nervous? 

Always. I don't be in front of the camera. I'm always like behind the cameras and taking photos everywhere. So this is new.

This is new. I'm excited 

the new me. 

This is the new you which has okay. I was thinking about this the other day I'm like, how long have we been friends? Like three years. I was gonna say I think three years, right? 

About three years. 

And so I will say like since we have been friends. I've watched you evolve And it's beautiful.

Yeah, it's been a lot. I looked at a lot of my photos from three years ago, like, did I take that? 

Isn't it funny when you, like, look back at, like, the, like, how you used to work, and then you're like, oh, thank God for the growth. 

Right. Right. I go back and edit some photos from three years ago. Like, how did I send that out?

Yeah, 

it's terrible. It's not terrible to my 

standards. Yeah. Well, okay. So you're here today because one, you, we're going to have you like set the foundation of like who you are, what you do, but, um, the main thing is that you. Recently launched a podcast, um, called Strong Mental Mindset, which I love because I'm like, there's a lot of people who are, I would say, like, going through some mental health challenges.

Right. And not many people are talking about them. And so I think when, again, knowing your backstory and knowing that you put this out. It's really like, wow, I'm so proud that you were confident to walk in this space to say, like, we need to have this conversation. 

Well, it's took me about 10 years to have this conversation.

Wow. 

I ended up, um, just facing my fears and period all out. I'm always trying to hold this mask of who I am. Like, I walk out in public, it's. Gaskins photography, Carter Gaskins, getting a house, it's pain, hurt, grief, those types of things like that. So trying to figure out a way to help others now since I've been through it, like, I don't know, I feel like a passion of mine.

Yeah. Okay. Let's go back to the beginning. So first of all, what got you into photography? 

Oh, that's, that's a deep story. So let you know ahead of time, I'm an emotional person. 

It's okay. Look, this is authentic media here. 

Tears and all that might come out. You might get the, the true me right now. Got into photography because in 2011, I lost my son at birth.

I didn't have any photos of him. So, when I had my next child in 2014, Cadence, who's my oldest, I just started taking a whole lot of photos of her. And I started loving the photos, loving the photos, and I was like, Hey, if this, if I'm collecting all these photos of her, I can now collect photos of other people.

And that's how I got into photography. 

Wow. 

Yeah, it's a lot. 

And how, how young was your son when he did pass? 

Uh, he lived for one hour. So, right at birth. 

Wow. 

Yeah, it was a lot. 

And so you kind of like put your passion towards photography in a way to where you're like you want to capture every moment.

Right. 

I use that pain and the anxiety and the grief and stuff that I use and started figuring out a way to find other people beautiful through the art of my photography. So I give them the photo and they're like, I didn't even know I looked like that. Wow. So I started bringing that out of people. 

And I always tell you, I'm like, you have a gift.

Like there's something about when you are in the studio behind the camera and you're like helping people position themselves to see themselves as like the light that they are. Right. You know, and I always tell you, like, don't take your work for granted because, um, everyone knows, like, I'm really, like, perfectionist when it comes to, like, you already know this, but when it 

comes to You're not telling me anything new.

When it comes to, like, just how I want to represent myself, you know? And I think, I always tell you, I'm like, you have a way to bring that out, and it's like, it's clean, it's polished, it's professional. Do you, like, see that about your work now? 

Not at all. 

Why? Let's talk about that. 

I'm my biggest critic.

It's never good enough. 

Oh my God. I'm 

always learning. I'm always on YouTube University. Oh my God. Trying to figure out better ways to edit, um, more efficient ways to shoot, better ways to pick up lighting. Like, it's never good enough. So, I'm always figuring I can do better. If I see something that you may look at and be like, this is like the Best photo ever.

Yeah. 

I'm looking at it like, I could have done this better or she could have moved this way a little bit more. Those type of things like that. So I don't give myself credit enough. 

Where do you think that comes from? 

Childhood. A lot of times I never give myself credit. My mother and my father are great human beings, but they didn't really give me the time to say, Hey, you did a good job with this or a good job with that.

So I had to try 

to figure out my way, my own way to give myself credit. I never figured it out, so. 

I resonate with that a lot. And it's interesting how, like, your parents affirmations, like, they mean so much. 

Right. 

Because then, like, you carry it with you in, like, your adulthood. 

Right. So now I end up giving my kids Over appreciation, like, Hey, you did this right.

Good job. You could have done better than that, but you did this good door, those type of things like that. So always giving them high fives every morning and give affirmation before they go to school. It's like overly. Everything, which they spoiled too. So . So there's something else that I spoil 'em. I get mad because they spoiled

Yeah. Wow. 

So it's a lot. 

Well, I love about your photography too. It's so versatile. Like you're not like in this one singular lane. You do like modeling, um, photography. Branding, um, professionalism, corporate, and so I guess like what made you kind of like create this business where you're like, I don't want to stay in one lane.

I want to like serve the needs of like everyone. 

My favorite is sports. 

Hmm. 

Uh, I have done a lot of KU sports, so I'm going to be a Chiefs photographer. 

Oh! I'm going to 

make sure that happens. I 

love it. 

Um, 

sports is my favorite, but I got to do like headshots, maternity, and I do everything that's up on kids.

Like, I dislike. He's like, 

that is true. There's not many, like, there's like women, 

I don't dislike infants, I just like infant photography. 

He's like, let me 

clean it up really quick. 

But I would say, I noticed that like you do maternity photos, but then like maybe after that there's not really much like 

women and 

babies 

and I tell the new mothers I like.

After they turn one year, one year old, like I would take, 

they have to be a certain age. 

It's just, I'm not, I don't feel as though I'm delicate enough. If you look at, have you ever looked at, uh, photography for infants? They had to bend their arms and twist them and turn them and pin them. And it looked like a pain, it looked like painful.

I don't want to be a 

part of it. That's fine. 

I don't. And plus is that. It's that, um, liability as well, like if you hurt an infant, like, yeah, I don't want to know parts of it, 

but 

I ended up going into all these different fields because there's so much out there. 

Yeah. I 

didn't want to be stuck in one little area.

So I wanted to learn it all and pick which one I like the best. 

I love it. 

Go from there. 

So let's get into, um, this podcast. Strong mental mindset. What does it mean and why'd you start it? 

Just started it. So, follow me. Follow me. I just started it. I'm trying to get something out there every month and going to be every week here, coming up soon.

But, um, I got into it because I went through a lot of mental health right after COVID when it came to, like, being agoraphobic, um, going through anxiety, going through depression, um. It was hard for me to even go out the house, walk around the block. Go to grocery stores stuff like that. People didn't see that of me, but only the people inside my household saw the pain I was going through So I got through that and I figured God made me well I'm gonna say made me God put me through this so I can use this to help others and that's when I started the podcast and end up helping others and talking to other men who go through it because We always hold on a mask.

Mm 

hmm. 

I have to be one way at all times strong trying to figure out a way to Conquer the world, make sure we're there for our family, and no one really sees the pain until it comes out in anger or frustration. 

Right. 

By that time, it could be too late for someone. 

Yeah. That 

anger or frustration could come up with, you know, hurting someone or losing someone or something like that.

So, trying to reach these people before they actually, you know, go through all of those phases. 

Hmm. 

And I just want to get in touch with other men and other women as well, too. Figure out a way to attach myself to them to help them. 

Now when you talk about pain, what pain are you talking about? 

Grief. Um, mental pain.

Physical pain is nothing compared to mental pain. 

Mmm. 

I can go to physical pain, that's nothing. 

Yeah. 

But mental pain, when you don't know what is actually going on, because your brain will put all this pain through your body, and next thing you know, your joints hurt, your back hurt, your, everything's hurt.

You're like, why is all these things? But also, like, your mind is not strong enough at the moment. 

Yeah. 

And you're trying to figure out a way, like, what's going on with me? Why is my mind not strong enough? 

Mm. 

So, that mental pain is very, very stressful. It's very, very hard to get out of. 

And it's interesting because I think there's different types of grief.

Right. And like, I learned that there is like, stages of grief. There's like, anger, there's acceptance, there's forgiveness. And then, I think acceptance is last, but I know for sure like, sadness and anger is like the first two stages that It's hard for people to get past. How did you get past the stages of like sadness and anger to get to forgiveness and acceptance?

Right. 

So the five stages, they don't go in one, two, three, four, five. It's not 

just like boom, boom, boom, 

boom. I skip on like one to four, two to three, back to one. 

That's real though. That's so real. 

I went through all of those. Yeah. And it's, it was hard for me to get to acceptance because I have. I had and still have, um, health anxiety.

So, I started going through health anxiety when my father passed away in 2010. So, when my father passed away in 2010, I was taking care of him because he was going through, um, kidney, uh, kidney disease. 

And 

I was going to the hospital with him and going through dialysis with him three times a week, staying there four hours, stressed out.

Trying to figure out, like, is something going to happen to him? So I'm stressed out to the point that I'm shaking the whole time. And I remember one of my father's friends said, you're going to go through a, um, a mental, I forgot what they call it, they call it, um, some type of mental issue or something like that.

But when, when she said it, I'm like, I'll never go through that. But going through all of that and losing my son a year after that, put me into like a health anxiety, like everything was trying to figure out what's going on with me. Why is this happening? Why I feel this way? I was in and out of the hospital probably like 20, 20 times a year.

Wow. 

Just like checking my own blood pressure, checking my own sugar, those type of things, because those are all the things I did for my father. 

So 

when he passed away, it all came to me and I had to learn how to get through all of those type of things as well. So. Going through all of that, and then when COVID hit, somebody who's going through health anxiety, and COVID hit, and you see all these things on the news about people dying, many people dying, that put me in like an overdrive.

Oh my god. 

Making sure I eat all my fruits, making sure I eat all my vegetables, I was like, just going through everything. Yeah, you're like, I want to 

make sure I'm good. Right. 

And then I caught COVID and that was like the worst, the worst sickness that I ever had. I ain't gonna lie. That put me down for like two or three weeks.

But when I got out of that, like that something started to happen. Like, like these things ain't going to hurt me. I had to keep moving, keep pushing for it. My kids needed me, all these things like that. And that's how I learned to accept my life as it is and go from there. 

Wow. So your mental anxiety was, you mentioned, like, it took you to the hospital.

Yes. Like, what did that episode look like? And how does someone know, like, that they need help? 

That's a hard question. 

Yeah. 

Because I don't want to say, like, hey, it's all anxiety when it could, it might not be anxiety. Right. So, it's one of those things you got to get checked up by a doctor. If a doctor tells you, hey, you good, you got to believe the doctor, like, you're good, you're okay.

I didn't believe. Yeah. It was like, hey, you're good. Okay, I'm good. 

Uh huh. 

Put it this way, it's like going to church on a Sunday, everything good. Then Tuesday and Wednesday, you're like, I'm done. I need to go back for another sign of service. Oh, wow. But yeah, it just wasn't like, I had to, I had to end up believing in myself.

At the end of the day, I knew it all was a trust issue through God. I didn't trust God to make sure that I was good. I wasn't controlling my own body, and I didn't put God in control of my body. 

Wow. So 

it was like, when I tried to do it my way. 

Yeah. 

It never works. But when I try to give it over to God and say, Hey, I can't even handle this no more.

This is up to you. Because I done tried medication. I done tried eating right. I done tried exercise. I done tried all these things. Nothing worked. I was like, okay. It's up to you. When I know God was over there like, I'm waiting for you. Whenever you're ready. 

I'm just waiting for you to come and ask me what the answer is.

Whenever you're ready. Whenever you're ready for me, I'm here and I'm like, no, I need to control my own body. And to the point I said, well, I can't control this no more. Here you go. And everything started to work out for itself. 

Wow. 

I don't even know what happened. It's just one day. It was like. I'm going outside again.

I'm going shooting again. I'm going to do this again. 

Yeah. 

And think about, 

you're going shooting again, 

shooting, like photography. 

Okay. I was like, 

I didn't 

know if you were like in the gun range or something. I was like shooting. 

Okay. Because I was going through that. I stopped photography for a while. And that was, it 

was that bad to where it just put everything on hold.

Everything on hold. Totally. When I say I couldn't go out the house, I literally couldn't go out the house, walk around the block with my girl. I was just like, Oh, I can't go no farther. I 

had to go 

back home. It was bad. It was really bad. 

And what do you call that? Is that just like a mental block? 

Uh, agoraphobia.

Hmm. Yeah, 

that you just can't really leave the house. 

Wow. 

And it all stems from like anxiety, health anxiety, those type of things like that. And it's like, it doesn't just happen overnight. I'm going like step by step by step and getting worse and worse and worse. 

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What did it look like the day that you were like, okay. I think you kind of talked about it a little bit, but like, was it prayer that over time that you kind of felt yourself like opening up again or like, what steps did you take? Because I always like to say that this is going to be a very educational platform where we want to kind of give someone the step by step guidelines on how to do it because it's just so easy for someone to like, hear your story and be like, wow, like, I feel the same way, but I don't know, like, next steps to take.

So in your situation, what did you do? Whether it's prayer, whether it was going to therapy, um, what did that look like for you? 

All of it, like, started off, um, prayer was the first thing. I just can't do it anymore. Like, pray, like, what do you need me to do? What do I need to learn from this? I always ask why as well.

Yeah. 

Because when I was going through grief, I was mad because I lost my son, I lost my father. 

Back to back too. 

Back to back within a year. Like, all of these things, I was Like upset about and I became upset with God about it, 

but I never asked 

like, God, why are you, why are you doing this? But when I started asking the words, like, why, why am I going through this?

I started getting the answer through prayer. I started figuring out like, okay, why are you going through this? Because why am I, why am I going through it? Because I need to use you to help other people. So it's like, um, the step by step way of prayer has to be first. After prayer, you have to start believing in yourself, you start reading how to find yourself, how to figure out who you are, because I lost who I was through the whole path.

And once you start figuring out who you are, then you go to therapy, and they will help you know who you are on top of knowing yourself as well. All those little things like, I didn't even think about that. Right. And you start thinking about all the things you went through as a child. I did go through that as a child, like that's what therapy brings out of you.

Yeah. 

All those little pieces that you forgot about that you blocked in your brain. Um, music, music helped me as well. And, um, try not to listen to, you know, 

hardcore 

music. Don't try not to listen to that type of stuff. It's more like things that help your mental, like the wavelengths that make your, like those types of music that get you going, like spiritual music.

I don't know. I can't really say what type of music. It was just more, I played it on like mental, 

mental 

health music. And it would give me that calming type of music. I didn't put it on like hardcore rap or nothing like that. 

Right. No secular music. 

Right. Nothing like that. 

Wow. 

But those, it takes stuff and it's not going to happen overnight.

It was a whole year process of just going through all of this. 

I loved how you talked about You started with prayer, and then you started with trusting yourself, believing yourself, because I think that is An exercise or I think it's step that we tend to overlook or we think that like, you know what, I don't have to do that.

I don't have to spend time with myself when honestly like spending time with yourself and the Lord is like all in one, just like the top things that you need to do. That's something I recently learned. Um, and then I loved how you were transparent about like going to professional help. Did you ever find a challenge as a black man?

Like going to therapy was something you didn't want to do because of the statistic like black people shouldn't be getting mental health or is that something like you just never even thought about? 

Yeah, I have. Um, my favorite words were, I'm good. 

Would you still say now? 

I still say. And I have 

to dig a little bit.

I'm like, What does that mean? Give me a little bit more. 

How's everything going? I'm good. Like, that's all I'll say. Like, I'm good. Because I'm so used to, I don't like asking people for help. 

Okay, so what is that? Why do we not like asking for help? 

I think it's 

Is it an ego thing? I think it's 

an ego. It's definitely an ego thing.

Especially for a man. 

Right. 

Like, we I complain. I do. I throw it out there, but I don't complain to a point where it's like, I just throw everything out there unless I'm frustrated or upset. 

I 

hold a lot in. And I just say, I'm good. I'll figure it out. 

Right. 

And then I would go in a room or something and then It's a whole conversation with just me and God.

Like how I'm going, what, what am I'm supposed to do with this? How I'm gonna figure this out, how I'm gonna move forward with this. It could be something about photography or life or whatever it is. I would just keep saying like how, like I'm good. 

So, speak to the men out there who may be struggling with some things and they're afraid to go ask for help.

What would you say to them 

if you don't feel comfortable or talking to a therapist? There's a friend out there who's always willing to help. A friend who doesn't tell your business to everyone. Everyone has that friend that they can just go to and say, Hey, this is what I'm going through. And if you don't have that friend, then you got no other choice either.

First talk to God. I will say that. But other than that, you have to go to a therapist. Like, you have to get this out of you somehow, somewhere. 

And then tell people what, what would it look like if you didn't ask for help? 

If you didn't ask for help, that's when the anger and frustration, you can lose a lot.

And not just like, you can actually lose your own life if you don't ask for help. Because it would get worse and worse and worse. And then the anger and the frustration would make you lose people. Losing people make you hold things in more and get frustrated. Getting frustrated can put you through a depression and depression can go who knows where.

You got to figure out a way to get the help that you deserve at the very beginning. 

What about the people that feel like it's hard to go to friends or family? I mean, some people really find it difficult to share what is mentally going on in their brain because no one understands, which we know is a lie, but like There are people out there who feel that I cannot do this, like, on my own.

I feel like I can't figure out what's going on, and no one around me can help. 

That's where the strong mental mindset comes in, because you, there, there's a podcast out there as well, other podcasts out there as well that can, you can listen to that offer support. 

That 

you're not in this alone. I was raised on, you don't show emotion.

Just to be older, show emotion. But it took me a long time to get where I'm at. My emotion was anger. That 

was 

my emotion all the way around. And that's what we were talking about a few minutes ago where I would say, I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. Until boom. Now, all of this comes out in the 20, destroy everything.

Right. 

And you just trying to figure out like, did I really mean that? Or was it just anger? I would say about 75 percent I 

meant. Not 75%! Yeah, 

but the other 25%, I shouldn't have said 

that. 

Yeah, I shouldn't have said that. You 

must be doing a lot of apologizing. 

I do. I do. 

You said 75%? I definitely meant it 

for sure.

Yeah, 

But, I mean, I think it's important that this is, um, communicated and talked about because, like I said, I think that it's easy to, um, really, like, walk this thing out in life and feel as if, like, You know, I got it taken care of. I'm good. Until you get to that isolation place, and that is being in your room all alone at night, um, or any time really, but mainly I think it hits a lot of people when they're just alone, isolated, away from the world, away from the friends, which is interesting because the Bible says like you should not Like man, like man should never even like walk this earth alone, which is why like God created a woman, you know and so which is why we need to be like in friendships and community and so even talk about the the importance or Significance around why having a community or why having strong mental mindset?

Is important for for men like yourself to have a community to go to 

yeah Definitely definitely need to be a community of men that can help other men. It has to be, if there's nothing in your area, it has to be something that someone has to put together. Even, even you, somebody has to put that together because it has to be a community of men to help other men, to get us out of what we're dealing with now with the youth, because.

What's going 

on with the youth? Cause this generation is, uh, interesting. It's different. 

It's different. When I grew up, it was a lot of, when I grew up, it was, it was a lot of, um, Respect. We don't do anything around our elders. It was yes ma'am, 

yes, 

yes sir, no ma'am, no sir. 

Right. 

Then we leave them, then we be bad somewhere.

Seriously. 

This generation now, they do things in front of the elders and everything else and it's just Yeah, it's, it's terrible. 

There needs to be a lot of guidance with this youth. 

Right, right. And I don't know if it's, uh, I don't know if it's a lack of parenting, or the kids just don't care. Because, you know, we grew up, we had Big Mama.

And we don't mess around with that. 

Yeah, yeah. When 

she says something or she's mad, we just automatically start crying. Like, alright, 

let me go to the closet somewhere. I'm okay. Right. 

I'm not trying to get Beaten with, you know, those hangers and switches and everything else. Like, so we had a lot of respect.

Now, these days, like the generation I'm in, we need to make sure the youth are well taken care of and it's going to take a lot of work that we have to make, we have to be the change because when we die out and they take control, I don't know what that generation underneath of that is going to be. And that's where I'm afraid of with my kids.

So. 

So let's get into, um, so we know that you are a business owner, Gaskins collection, Gaskins photography collection, and now you have a podcast, which is awesome. Um, talk about speaking to the business owners and entrepreneurs out there who may be trying to figure out how to navigate mental health challenges while showing up.

Doing their business and their daily work. Right. What are the challenges that you're seeing? 

Business itself is a challenge. That 

part. That part. It 

is a challenge for sure. Um, you can have good days, you can have bad days. 

Mm hmm. 

But it takes a strong mental mindset to run a business and you're going to, you're going to fail, you're going to have success, and you can have times that people don't call, you can have times to get overwhelmed with calls, but you need to know like what steps to take in.

How to guide yourself through it. And that's the hardest part because the days that no one call, I'm stressing, like, what's going on? Why didn't he do better? When am I going wrong? Like the times that you get like 10 calls a day, I don't get this done. And then it ain't no matter of two weeks. 

So 

it's always something that you got to make sure you had a mindset to take care of.

Was there ever a time like in your business where you were so overwhelmed with like the amount of clients you had? Um, or maybe there was a time where you, like, I think right now there's even like this issue with sometimes we get this high energy in our business, right? It's like the momentum of like, Oh, I'm getting all this clientele.

People are coming in like, this is great. And then it kind of falls off. It kind of flat lines. And so I think that, that season of emptiness or there's no one calling in, there's no clients coming in. How do you maintain your mental health through that process? 

It's hard to maintain it because you always want clients to come in and call all the time.

But I've learned those days off, I can spend time with my kids. 

Yeah. 

And I had to make sure, like, instead of stressing about why people ain't calling, it's like, It's like God telling me, Hey, here's your break, 

your 

kids need you. So I started spending more time with them, going out more with them. It's just a flow.

It's just a flow. I'm terrible at marketing. Terrible at marketing. We're 

working on it with you. We're going to get you there. 

It's all word of mouth for me. 

Yeah. I 

will take a photo of someone and say, Hey, so and so told me you took that photo. Can you take mine? Sure. I'm not the type of person who just send 100 emails a day.

I started off that way though. 

But 

when stuff started coming in, I'm like, Oh, that's cool. It's fine. It's coming in. Then you hit that big drop. You like, maybe I need to start that again 

and 

go from there. Um, but with photography though, it's, it's hard to start over. Um, cause when I went through what I went through, like I lost all my clients because I had to start referring them to somebody else because I couldn't do it physically.

Couldn't do it. So then when I was ready to go, I'm like, okay, I'm back. They're like, Oh, I done found somebody else now. So now I had to regain their trust and regain other people's trust and say, Hey, I can, I hate to say it this way, but I can do it better than them. It's a competition basically. So it was just hard for me to pick all of that back up and go from there.

That's interesting because it's like, I wonder how many of us, because I think I kind of went through that process where, um, how many of us start a business and we, like, we sustain this momentum because we're feeling good, everything in our life is going great, but as soon as your mental health is affected, you feel like you have to shut everything down and you have to shut it down.

I wonder how many entrepreneurs out there are going through this process where they feel like, you know what, they wake up one day and they're like, I can't do this anymore. And they just shut down. They don't communicate with their clients. They don't, um, inform them, like, hey, taking a mental health break.

Right. Which it sounds like that probably should be something that we should do is just saying like, Hey, I'm just going to wake up and email my email and say, Hey, everyone, thank you so much for your support and time with me. I want to just communicate to you that I'm taking a hiatus, you know what I mean?

Because I think that you would lose out. You would do yourself a disservice. It would be unfair to you in the long end when you are ready to go back to work. You're ready to serve your clients, but they're not, they're not there anymore. 

The world don't stop. The world doesn't stop for you. 

The world does not stop for you.

Right. 

When, when you shut down and say, Hey, I really can't do this right now. I need a month. That month hurts because they are still looking, 

right? 

They got to find somebody else served, right? 

But this is why it's so important for entrepreneurs and business owners to build a community that trust you. And you are communicating to them.

Hey, even when I do need a mental health plan. break, they know they're not going anywhere. They can be encouraging you. And I think this is why it's so important where I had to find the understanding of like, this is why personal branding is important is because as you are showing up every day, right?

Everyone doesn't see in the behind the scenes, right? No one knows what's going on in your world. They don't care. They just want your service. They're just like, Hey Carter, like, can we meet for a photo shoot or what? Like, where are you at? But deep down, you're like. In the bathroom somewhere, like having a mental breakdown, it's like, I think this is why it's important to create a strong community that trusts you, that understands you, and even when you take a break, they're still going to be there.

I agree. Because businesses don't care about your mental breakdown. 

They don't. They 

be like, oh, sorry to hear that. 

Right. 

Talk to you later. Right. 

So as soon as I had my mental breakdown, um, the second day of the event, Is when I had mine, is where, you know, second day. I was in the dressing room before I go out on stage.

Right. And I'm literally crying in the dressing room like, I cannot do this because I was mentally exhausted. Right. How terrible is that? People are out there waiting for me. They're just like, they don't know what's going on. They're just like, great event. And so I had the moment. Where I shut down as well after the Rise and Thrive conference and I just went inside and people were like, where'd she go?

It's funny you said that because mental breakdowns could be different Everyone now you had a whole crowd crowd out there waiting for you 

Mm hmm, and 

you have a mental breakdown like other people like wow, look how many people here She's so successful, but I don't see what you're going through On the back end, like trying to please everyone, make sure this is going to be good enough, not for just them, for yourself, like all of these different things, it's, it's stressful.

Right. 

Yeah. And then when you get out there, you're like, I did it. 

Yeah. 

And then you go through the mental breakdown. Could I have done it better? Did they, were they satisfied? Did I get any negative reviews? You see all these positive things out there, but it might not be good enough. 

Yeah. And you're trying to 

figure it out.

It's so crazy. And I think that after that, that was the reason why I had to take a break. Cause I said, I cannot show up in these spaces like this anymore to where I'm doing myself a disservice by not being my best self and not giving them my best. Because in the end, I was giving them a version of me that they wanted me to be.

I understand that. I understand that. For sure. That 

part, you know? 

That's what we do. Like, we give them the version that they want us to be. 

Yeah. 

Then you go home and you're exhausted because that's not the version of you. So you had to make sure you put all of this makeup on to make sure that you please everyone.

When 

you go to these big meetings and everything, like, Hey, this is who I am. This is who it is. Blah, blah, blah. Then you go home, like. I hope I pleased them, but it wasn't really you. 

Right. And you're exhausted. And 

then they see y'all in public like, that's a whole different person than I saw at that meeting.

Like, are you okay? What's going on? You're like, I'm great. It's just Tuesday. I just haven't woken up yet. And yes. How many of us Do that where we're just like, I just need a minute to like collect myself. And so I think that it was the biggest wake up call I could ever have. And I think for me, it was, this is why I want to create a platform that's so authentic and real to where even if I say, Hey guys, I need a month away.

I love you. Just know I'm working hard. I'm resting and I'm thinking of you, but during this time, I'm not taking any service. And to hopefully have the audience and community that trust you so much to say, okay, we will be here when you return. Right. And if you don't have that type of community, they're not your real community.

I understand. 

At all. Right? I understand. And so I think that for me, as I'm coaching and teaching people how to create an authentic personal brand, it's so you can show up fully. As yourself, for yourself, but you don't lose yourself. 

Completely understand. I like that. Because that happened to me. I was taking photos for a company as a freelancer.

And they didn't want me to work for the other company that was a competitor. And I was a freelancer. So they let me go because I wasn't working for, because I was working for both companies at the time as a freelancer. And I was so upset with myself, like, why, like, why he let me go and this and that. That was the mask I put on.

But when I end up knowing who I am, I'm like. I'm like, Oh no, like I'm not working for them no more. Like, why would you let me go come working for another company? Like I'm a freelancer. I don't work for you. So I'm like, I don't care about them anymore. I'm work who I want to work with, how to figure out who I wanted to work with.

And that's who I want to work with. And now there's times I say no to people, which I never said before. You want to work with me? Yeah. You want to do this? Yeah. Now I'm like, I don't think you're the right fit. 

Yeah, that part. Nah, 

I don't, nah, let's, I would recommend you to someone else. Because I, I feel as though you're not the person who I want to work with.

100%. 

And it was big for me when studio photos is too, studio photos as well. Like, I will research all your Facebook. All your Instagram, 

our research, 

our research, because if you call me, I'm going to know who I'm working with. So if I see you on some street stuff on your Instagram, nah, you're not the right person that I want to work with right this moment.

You're 

researching people before they come to your studio. I have 

to know who's coming in the studio. It's 2024. I have to know who I'm working with. 

That's true. 

You come in there, you be like Um, 

they don't 

board like 16 people with them or something like, nah, it's not going to work. 

That's smart though.

Yeah, you have to, especially if you meeting people in a closed environment with just me and this person. Yeah, I gotta, I gotta know who I'm working with. 

That makes sense. 

And that's protecting me and my family. 

That's good. 

Because if something happened to me, my family is, yeah. 

Yeah. 

So I have to make sure my kids are good.

Okay, so before we tell people our newest project that we're working on, what are some like just three takeaways that you want to share when it comes to the Strong Mental Mindset podcast? And, um, anything relating to mental health, if you, just three things that you hope that people take away. 

Three takeaways.

Put me on the spot. 

I did. I, I asked you, were you ready to be in the hot 

seat? Put me on the spot. Three takeaways. One, you don't have to go through this yourself. Um, as we talked about, there are people out there who's willing to help. They might not be friends now, but they will be friends later who will help you go through it.

What should have been number one is trust God. 

Yeah. 

Um, pray, get spiritually strong, um, and being spiritually strong will make you emotionally and physically strong. And three, just have fun, be yourself. If they like you, they like you, they don't, they don't as simple as that. 

That's good. It wasn't that 

hard.

Think 

about it. I'm like, this is authentic media. 

You're right. You're right. 

Okay. So before we close out, I thought it would be a great opportunity to share what we're cooking up. Right. And so I'm super excited to share that we are going to be offering some branding photo shoots to our clientele. And essentially what that looks like is we want you to, first of all, fill out the form.

That's number one. Okay, so fill out the form. Okay, you're going to be either qualified or disqualified by not filling out the form. Uh, which you would be surprised how many people don't fill out a form. Yeah. Which is interesting. But, anyways. Um, but it really just helps. Let's get to know who you are, what your business is and what you are looking for in your brand and what you hope it to be.

So after you fill out that form, we're going to take you through a brand identity session, which essentially it's just you and I sitting down talking about who you are as an individual because who you are. At your core is so important. And so is that showing up in your branding? And if not, we need to figure out how to do that.

So you'll get a brand identity session, um, with me. And then after that, we will figure out what type of photo shoot, um, that your business needs or your company needs. And so Carter and I will, he'll be doing the photography actually. I won't be taking photos, but I will be there kind of like just helping, uh, make sure that.

Your hair looks good. Your makeup looks good. Um, and just pretty much like everything, the visual is like coming to light when it comes to the photos that you want. So, um, yeah, we're excited to be offering this branding photo shoot package. And so I know we have like a couple of different names. We will be by the time this airs, obviously you should have all of the information on how to sign up, um, and how to see if we are a good fit for you.

And if you are a good. Fit for us. And so, yeah, that's just a little bit about it. Do I leave anything out? 

Nah, I'm looking forward to it. It's, it's going to be fun. Get the whole brand new photo, get hair, makeup, 

hair, makeup, 

clothing, get everything all in one. 

Yeah. We're just doing a lot 

all in one, 

all in one, exactly.

We're all in one service. So we're super excited for it because, um. We just see that there is a gap in, in this community when it comes to professional photos, when it comes to professionalism showing up, um, on your website, um, on social media, it can be anything branding wise. If you do not have an updated headshot by now, honey, please come talk to us.

Okay. Like you need to have an updated headshot. Your website needs to have, you know, just let's even talk about that really quick. Like why that is important, right? To have professional photos on your website as a photographer. Like what is that? Why it's important. 

Yeah. Not a camera photo, 

not a camera photo, 

professional headshot with a white, gray or black backdrop.

Yes. 

Um, you look professional for one business will take you serious. Uh, and like I said, it's not a headshot. It's not a selfie. Oh, 

that's cute. Let me just. Right. No, honey. No, we're not doing that. 

It's good for definitely LinkedIn, for sure. LinkedIn, all the social media sites that you have your business in.

Like I said, I look at who I shoot 

and I 

know other businesses look at who they are working with as well. 

Mm hmm. 

So if they go there and see a professional head shot, like, Oh, this person's professional, I'm willing to work with them. Especially if you're in the corporate world too. You do look at who's going to work on your mouth as a dentist or who's going to be working on your body as a doctor.

So why wouldn't you go see who you're looking at for hair, makeup, or whatever you're looking at in professional ways. So you have to make sure you have a professional head shot for sure. 

A hundred percent. 

Yeah. 

Yeah. 

It brings so much more business now. 

And just even for your website, it looks professional.

You look like the expert. You look like, you know, what you're talking about, what you're doing. Um, and like you said, it's 2024 people research people before they go and have, you know, service with them. Um, so we definitely want to make that space easy for you. And it comes with a brand identity session. So just throwing that out there that you're not going to just walk onto the set and.

You know, start taking photos. We thought it was very important for us to, um, talk with you, figure out who you are and making sure that your photos are coming to life in the way that you want to be represented. So remember your brand is your reputation. So how do you want to show up in the world? Okay. In the meantime, Carter, that's it.

It's 

always good. It's always 

good. 

All right. Thanks for tuning in guys. 

Thank you. 

Thanks for watching the Authentic Media Podcast YouTube. At Authentic Media Company, our mission is to help you develop an authentic brand so you can make the impact that you are called to make. If you got anything from today's episode, make sure you drop a comment down below.

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